Everything is Always Fine Until It Isn’t


After I quit my job, I went through a really tough time adjusting to all the down time. I’m used to constantly going. I worked full time, and I go to school full time, so on a normal basis, I was busy 90% of the time. Sure it was stressful, but it actually helped me stay focused and keep my mind busy.

But when I quit my job, school was on winter break, and suddenly I had nothing to do. No purpose. No deadlines. No obligations. Instead of taking advantage of my newfound freedom and vegging out on the couch or going out with friends, I fell into a pretty deep funk. It lasted a couple weeks.

But the past few weeks have been great. I’d made that slow climb back to normalcy, and I felt like me again. Until yesterday.

I don’t even know what happened. I went to bed about the same time I normally do. The only difference is, when it came time to get up, I decided not to. I slept for close to 22 hours, and when I finally managed to drag myself out of bed, I was right back in the hole I’d just gotten out of.

What happens exactly? Is there a trigger? Is it random? Do I unknowingly self-sabotage? I really wish I knew the answers to these questions.

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4 thoughts on “Everything is Always Fine Until It Isn’t

  1. I think there is probably a trigger that you just don’t see. Maybe try making yourself a goal to accomplish before school starts? Just something to work on so you have something to do- I know how it feels going from 90 miles an hour to nothing. I think the feeling is probably totally normal!

    Liked by 1 person

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